Day 59

Nappy total = 58*x2 + ux + fx, where u(rine), f(aecal matter) and x are all infinite Percentage of day spent thinking about the boy: 98% Confessions about inability to properly launder clothes: 1 It had to come. As much as I didn’t want it to, day 59 was going to rear its ugly head […]

Competition and nostalgia

Dirty nappies: back to a reliable 1 per day Hours of sleep per night: up to an unprecedented 11 (*rapidly knocks on wood*) Number of buggies in the Southbank Centre at lunchtime: 36 million By sheer coincidence, my final week of APL coincided with half term in London. A slightly alarming glimpse into our future […]

Now that the rain has come

it’s my final week of Additional Paternity Leave. More thoughts and feelings on that in a subsequent post, but as we’re now stuck indoors with rain lashing down, I thought it worth pointing out that it has been one of the loveliest weeks – including beautiful weather and daily walks accompanied by glorious bird song. […]

A question of class

Number of nappies used in a week: four times as many as we used last week. Seriously. Number of people in household suffering from the same bug since last post: EVERYONE. Number of nappies employed by adults: 0, but at times it has been very tempting. As you may have guessed, the Plague hit Sydenham […]

Long suffering wives and grandmothers

Dirty Nappies since last post: Entirely lost count (app, what app?) Number of people in household suffering from some ailment or other: Everyone Number of things said to my mother that I regret: lots I have to begin this post with two apologies. One to my wife, for having been a bit of an ogre […]

Your baby will bounce

Trips to A&E – 1 Number of babies surviving my clumsiness – 1 (thank God) Amount of guilt: infinite I dropped my child down the stairs today. There. Said it. Admitted my grievous failing publicly from the outset so that you know a) how bad I feel about it, and b) that happily, on the […]

River Meandering

The last couple of days have involved a fair bit more discovery – of both our local area and up in East London. What’s struck me is the quality of the parks and wildlife in both. joining the slightly scuzzy looking river path in Lower Sydenham (behind the Sainsbury’s petrol station), we soon found ourselves […]

and then it was Monday

Dirty nappies: 0 (lots of wet ones, mind) Premature awakenings from naps: 3 (if you have children, you know this equals disaster) Quantity of banana on the kitchen floor and cupboards: 4 gallons After all the prosaic thoughts over the weekend, Monday brought our household back to earth with a bump. It was one of […]

Time with the boy

It’s Saturday night and I’m home alone with the fire on, Ken the cat on my lap and Match of the Day on the box . Or, rather, I’m the only adult in the house and the boy is asleep whilst the Missus is out gallivanting. I’ve had a very pleasant evening putzing around, tidying […]

Hula Gate

Dirty Nappies before 9am: 2 whoppers Sore stomach muscles from gyratory activity: all of them Teenagers crossing the road to avoid bearded many with buggy: 297 Yesterday was a corker of a day for seeing how far I could push the gate out for paternal activity. Without fixed plans at the beginning of the day, […]

fiftyeightdays

A bit of an exposé into eight weeks and a couple of days of Additional Paternity Leave (with the possible subplot of persuading other dads to do the same)